Married Men and Hotel Room Deaths

By Uche Amunike

Just last week, I came across a video clip of a young girl being interrogated over the death of a 60year old man who died in a hotel room shortly after having sexual relations with her. Lying cold on the bed was the deceased, gone and gone forever. It is just one out of the myriad of hotel room deaths recorded in our society today. As I listened to the young girl narrate the much she knew about the man’s short stay with her, I felt anger for the man and pity for her. Here’s her story: She is a prostitute and earns a living from the money she makes from her clients. According to her, she was approached by a third party who informed her that a certain man needed her services. She struck a bargain with the man, he agreed to her terms and they left for the hotel where she was to meet her waiting client. After they met, he ordered food for both of them and shortly after, they both went to sleep. She said they did not have anything to do with each other until the wee hours of the morning. After their romp, he personally walked to the bathroom and had himself all cleaned up and returned to the bedroom. They had a normal conversation about her time to leave as she told him that she would leave when it was safe to do so. He agreed, went back to sleep while she waited for her departure time. When it was time to go, she tried waking him up to no avail. She shook him to no end and got worried. Innocently, she rushed out to get help right there in the hotel and the manager followed suit, tried his bit and yet the man refused to budge. Then it dawned on them that he was indeed dead. A doctor was invited who confirmed him dead. Then the police who were called, advised them not to let the young girl go.

As she was questioned right there in the hotel room, I couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming wave of pity for her. All I could see was her innocence and naivety. She was visibly shocked and obviously shaken. I know that most prostitutes in her shoes would have walked away with a straight face the moment they realized he was dead, without looking back. No prostitute will sit around and wait to be found with the corpse of a client, how much more go to seek help to check if he was okay or not. I refuse to judge her like most people did on social media because I do not know her story. I do not know how come she found herself in the sex hawking business. Come to think of it, she was on her own lane minding her business when she was approached to offer her services and she gave a price which was agreed on. As a matter of fact, she is still being owed for those services. Atop that, her picture is being shared all over the cyber space alongside an irresponsible old man, no apologies to him, please. For what crime? For having a consensual business deal with her fellow adult?

Now, let’s look at the issue of the deceased and why I think he killed himself. After he was confirmed dead, his bag was searched by the young men that interrogated the young girl. What did they find? Different kinds of aphrodisiacs. There was also a card of malaria pills that was displayed as well, which means he might have been a little under the weather too. High blood pressure pills were also there and the annoying part was that the aphrodisiacs were not just one type. They were different types. The hotel manager also confirmed that he was a regular customer in their hotel and while all this was going on, the young girl watched with obvious worry about what her fate would be. Look, it is about time we called a spade a spade. That young girl should be let off the hook because she still stands innocent as it is.

Look at the man’s age. He was a whole 60 and went for a young girl that couldn’t be more than 20. What was his reason? He had faith in his aphrodisiacs. Do men even know how aphrodisiacs work? We argued this out in one of my media WhatsApp chat rooms and majority of my male colleagues claimed that some aphrodisiacs were devoid of side effects. What sheer ignorance!

It is really scary the way men above the age of 50 take in a lot of the concoction hawked by road side sellers of these killer sex-enhancing drugs. Traditional medical practitioners also produce plenty of these local aphrodisiacs. They give them all sorts of names- Gbagaba, Fapataya and all sorts of crazy names. My question remains, what are men trying to prove? That they are strong even in their older ages? Or what? Does having sex in any way show a man’s strength? Perhaps it should be ‘having sex with a much younger person that is still filled with the youthfulness that is hard to match the sexual capacity of middle aged or older men.

Men, can I talk to you? Sex is a beautiful thing. It is as enjoyable as it is healthy. It is actually one of nature’s best gift to humanity. When it is however propelled by artificial means, it might be damaging to the mind and body. What do these aphrodisiacs you take do to you? How does it work? How come it enhances your sexual desire? I’ll tell you. It simply increases blood flow to your male organs which makes you get harder but the side effects can be deadly. Most times, they lead to renal failure, heart problems, itching and burning of the penis, respiratory problems, bloody urine, coma and death. Importantly, if you have certain illnesses, you shouldn’t go near aphrodisiacs even with a 10 feet pole. The deceased was already on high blood pressure medication and should not have taken the aphrodisiac at all. Sex should not be used as a yardstick for measuring strength. I came across an article written by a medical doctor and he explained that sex should be a short-lived high-tempo muscular activity. Erection is caused by flooding of blood which is not meant to last for too long, otherwise it would deprive the organ from having nutrients and oxygen. The penis is meant to go turgid in a while and shortly after, relax for improved blood flow. These aphrodisiacs distort blood circulation in the body, most times causing irreparable damages to the heart and the brain.

Please, having sex for prolonged hours doesn’t make you a world champion. Therefore, make do with the much energy your testosterone allows you and leave prolonged sexual activities to people whose age brackets allow it. Stay away from sex enhancing drugs and native concoctions so that your days might be long.

The deceased man is lying cold now and his burial date has already been fixed. I saw his obituary poster and he looked like an influential man in society. My heart goes out to his family at this time. I wonder how my fellow woman, his wife feels. What a shameful way to die. And his children? They will forever be described as the children whose dad died in a hotel room after cheating on their mother. The man is now dead and the shame trailing his end is now to be borne by his family. Still wondering how that widow of his will mourn him. Wholeheartedly? Sadly? Resignedly? Who knows? It is time for men to sit up to their responsibilities. We are always tired of discussing men who died in the arms of their lovers in different hotels. It is indeed tiring that our children go to the internet and see old men having the videos of their bare lifeless bodies posted all over the internet. It is something that is truly unforgivable, especially in cases like this. I know that this family will face the worst kind of stigmatization that might last them a lifetime all because the head of the family wants to prove to his daughter’s age mate that he is a champion in between the sheets. I pray that God gives that family the fortitude to bear this loss.

As for the young girl in police custody, they had better release her, biko. She committed no crime as far as I am concerned. She is a product of society. I pray that someday, God will touch her heart to stop toeing the path of prostitution. Her ordeal should be a lesson to other young girls who endanger their lives every day in the name of making a living. I also hope that men have learnt their lessons too from the death of the man in this narrative. God help us!!!