Stories are part of our lives. We tell stories about ourselves, others and even things around us. We write stories and tell them to ourselves and others. But what happens when the stories we tell about ourselves, others and these things are wrong. What happens when we tell the wrong stories and even lie about them. What happens when this same stories are incomplete or misleading? What if we keep telling them over and over again? Guess what? It completely changes our lives and the way we view life itself. Instead of providing clarity in our lives it keeps us stuck to a place. It keeps us thinking that life is just like the same old story we have been narrating. The way we narrate our lives shapes what they become. That’s the danger of telling these stories because they can really mess us up but at the same time, it’s also their power. Because what this simply means is that, if we can change our stories, we can change our lives.
Now think of those stories about yourself you’ve told wrong or is misleading you and even those around you. Be Frank with this.
Most at times, our stories keep circling around two key things; the first is freedom and the second is change. Yet, we are made prisoners of ourselves by the stories we write and tell.
Think of this: a prisoner was kept behind bars, he kept shaking the bars desperately trying to get out but yet on the right and the left, its open. That’s most of us. We feel completely trapped, stuck in our emotional jail cells that we lie to ourselves. We want to make the stories sound pleasant and so enriching to captivate others. We want others to feel envious of our lives that we do not know the implications of telling the wrong stories of our lives. We consequently refuse to walk in the bars of freedom because we know there’s a catch. The catch of reality and facing the truth. We remain behind these bars and keep revolving around the same old stories we cooked up a long time ago.
Freedom comes with responsibility and if we take responsibility of our role in the stories we tell, we might have to change. And that’s the other common theme in our stories, Change.
Stories for change may sound like when a person says, “I want to change”, but what she really means is, “I want another character in the story to change”. It makes no sense at all. Change, even real positive change involves a surprising amount of loss of the familiar. Even if the familiar is unpleasant or utterly miserable. The familiar may actually be a friend, a negative attitude or even you. You just have to let that familiar go to write and tell a better story that will lead to freedom and change that you desire. You don’t get stuck with a friend who drags you down and at the end you expect a lifting up. Life gives back exactly what you give to it. Feed it with things good and better things it brings in return.
We talk so much in our culture about getting to know ourselves, but part of getting to know yourself is to unknow yourself. To let go of the one version of the story you’ve been telling yourself so that you can live your life and not the story you’ve been telling yourself about your life. Only you can write your story and only you can tell the right story.
You don’t just tell these stories because you feel like saying anything. No, you need to know what you are saying and be sure it’s coming from within. You also need to edit these stories you tell. In other to be a good editor, you need to offer wise compassion to yourself. Editing these stories helps you to see what you left while writing the story and this is the hardest step in the editing process. But it is also where change begins. You analyse the terms and the characters in your stories. Do they deserve where they are placed? And if they do, what role are they playing there? If they aren’t playing that role, do yourself good while editing the story and remove them, then replace them with better characters. Do not be sentimental in writing or editing these stories. The earlier you understand you are the writer of these stories you are telling, the better your life becomes.
Think about this, what would happen if you looked at your story and wrote it from another person’s point of view. What would you see now from this wider and yet narrow perspective. We have created all kinds of stories distorted through a narrow lens that we don’t even know what we’re looking through and what we’re seeing too.
Life itself is about deciding which stories to tell, which is to be listened to and which needs an edit. Life teaches the worth of the effort to go through a revision because there’s nothing more important to the quality of ur lives than the stories we tell ourselves about them.
Change your story and tell it real, that way you know where it needs an edit so that you will experience a positive change.
Change your narrative and tell it the way you see it, that way you get a clearer picture of your life because these stories we narrate make our lives what it is.
Meanwhile, Coronavirus has not been eradicated, do yourself good and stay safe.
Have a great week ahead!